Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
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