Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
i think i have herpe
just one?
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Randomize