her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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