The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Randomize
