this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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