Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
I yelled at your uterus for you.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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