Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
and i looked up. we had an audience...
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
try to milk me bitch
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