have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
