Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
