I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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