it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
Randomize
