Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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