why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
Welp...herpes.
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Randomize