so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
