Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
Randomize
