please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
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