she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
