you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
