It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Randomize
