So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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