You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I feel like abortions should bother me more
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
bring money and cleavage
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
A very confused plastic surgeon just called. Apparently I called asking how much it costs to get a vodka funnel installed straight to my brain...
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Randomize
