He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
