I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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