I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
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