it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Randomize
