I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
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