would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize