He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Randomize
