life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
