i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
Randomize