just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Less talking, more tequila
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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