Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
operation have a gay friend backfired
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize
