I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
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