Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
