We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
