Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Randomize
