Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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