let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Randomize
