I'm pants shitting drunk right now
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Randomize
