I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
A+ Viking dick
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Randomize
