this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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