It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
