Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
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