fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
Randomize
