Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
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