you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
