Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
