Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
