this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
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