You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
You need a sexual gate keeper
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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