I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Randomize
